Asking for Help Gracefully

One of the hardest things that many people struggle with is asking for help when we need it. Everyone needs to seek and receive support from time to time. Often asking someone, “Are you able to help me” can ultimately cause a good deal of stress and potential embarrassment.

Many of us often struggle to ask for help more than accept it when offered. When we struggle, asking for help can be the “saving grace” we need to continue after failure. Asking for help is not cowardly and can be done easily. Let’s explore some steps to ask for help when you need it gracefully. 

Remove Your Fear of Asking

People often do not want to ask for help due to the fear of being told no. The fear of rejection is the most commonly despised feeling of human emotion, and nearly every person will worry about rejection, especially when asking for help. Asking for help, in general, can be uncomfortable, and people will want to avoid the shame of rejection, so they say nothing. People generally like to see themselves as valuable and are often willing to take action when asked for help. So when you want to ask for help gracefully, it is essential to remove the fear of asking for help. It will allow the ask to come across more genuine and needed when asking someone for help more gracefully. 

Clarify The Help That Is Needed

Ideally, when you want to look for help, you need to know what you need help with in the first place. When asking for help, being generic does not always yield the best results. This is because not everyone willing to help just provides monetary support or generic assistance. If you need specific help with a task or other need in your life, you will clarify what you need help with. Defining what you need help with can also set you up for better success with getting the help you need when you need it. It also always asks you to ask for help more gracefully and respectfully. 

Be Mindful of Who and How You Ask for Help

When you want to ask for help, gracefully knowing who to ask is another step once you have clarified what you need help with. Let’s be honest here; not everything will be willing or able to help when you ask them for it. Therefore, you will need to take stock and consider who to ask first and foremost. Also, you need to keep in mind if you can ask friends or family for support or need to ask a professional. 

In addition to taking the time to figure out who to ask for help, you may want to also pay attention to your word choices and how you ask for help. For example, when you genuinely need help or assistance, you must aim to come across as kind, compassionate, and most of all genuine. For example, if you come across as ultra-independent, it can be challenging to ask for help in general. Still, if you come across inauthentic or even demanding, it’s going to make it that much more challenging to find someone willing to help when you need it. You may also need to consider the timing of your request as many of us have our own things going on in life, so you want to make sure you understand if someone cannot assist, it may not be in their control to assist at that moment in time. It can be challenging and stressful to ask for help from an acquaintance or a stranger, but once you know who and how to ask, it can help you get the help you seek more easily. Take into consideration that who and how you ask can play a huge role in actually receiving the service you need.

Ensure You Give Help In Return

When asking for help, you must never forget gracefully asking and receiving support if you are available to help in return when and if you can. For example, when I see the need for help in the classroom, I permit myself to help at least once in each kid’s class per year. I make myself available to help while not overdoing it for myself. There was a prior version of me that was a room mom in 5 classrooms for my kids; however, I am no longer a room parent in any classroom because I am more aware of the fact that when I say yes to something, I am saying no to other things. This usually resulted in me saying no to my needs and not taking care of myself, which hindered all of us more than helping. Learn that lesson from my experience and not your own while ensuring that you give as you can in return so that you can better ask for help gracefully.